Raising a family in today’s world is tough. Money is stretched between bills and more bills. So much time is spent at work that it seems nearly impossible to find good quality family time. How is a family supposed to navigate all of the responsibilities and demands of a modern society? Well look no further than this comprehensive list. It is sure to contain all of the answers to help your family out.
1. Quit using toilet paper. Not using toilet paper can save a family an average of $25 per year! Just think what you could do with the money you’ll be saving!
2. Live next door to someone who has a garden. As long as you leave a nibbled carrot behind, they will assume a rabbit stole their vegetables.
3. Clean the baby the same time you clean your dishes. This allows you to save on time, and it saves money on soap. The garbage disposal is also perfect for getting rid of human waste, just in case.
4. Deny yourself of all ungodliness. Vanity and sloth are tools of the devil. Trade in your designer jeans for a black floor-length dress. The only fitting outfit for a respectable young woman. Very respectable indeed.
5. Have the entire family help with dinner. There’s nothing that ease’s mom’s stress more than having four children under the age of 12 in the kitchen while water is boiling.
6. Have celebrity children. Celebrity children have been known to more than quadruple a family’s income. Simplify the process of obtaining a celebrity child by having children that are already famous. I would recommend Ariana Grande or one of the boys from One Direction. They are both doing very well right now.
7. Dump all of your problems off on our parents. Your parents worked really hard so you could have a better life. Don’t let all that work be for nothing. Your parents will be more than willing to sacrifice their retirement so that you can have a life-long vacation.