This Week in Jokes! – Donald Trump’s Favorite Bible Verse

Donald Trump’s Favorite Bible Verse

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Read the jokes here!

Last week at the MTV Music Video Awards Kanye West announced that he’ll be running for president in 2020. It’ll be weird to have a candidate that says crazy, off the cuff, insensitive stuff all the time.

Speaking of which, when Donald Trump was asked what his favorite Bible verse was he couldn’t think of one. It’s inspiring to see how seriously he takes Christian humility.

To help him out, I’ve picked out a few Bible verses that I think Trump would enjoy.

In the beginning Trump created heaven and the Earth. On the second day he declared bankruptcy.” -Trump 1:1

The Gentiles are bringing drugs, they’re bringing crime, they’re rapists, and some, I assume, are good people.” -Trump 3:16

Mary Magdalene is not a 10.” –Trump 10:9

Donald Trump's Favorite Bible Verse

Donald Trump’s favorite Bible verse

This week former Texas governor Rick Perry became the first GOP candidate to drop out of the primary. Perry had the same thought that I did 1/2 mile into my first cross country race “I’m just going to quit now before I embarrass myself.”

He did seem optimistic when he discussed his campaign. He said “I guess finishing in the top 20 isn’t so bad.

Rick Perry is now spending his weekend emailing AM radio talk shows about job openings.

During a Labor Day parade in Pennsylvania people shouted “Run Joe Run!” As Joe Biden marched by. Turns out the crowd just wanted to get the parade over with.

Hillary Clinton’s email scandal continues to be a big topic. But that’s what I like about the other main Democrat candidate Bernie Sanders. You know there will never be an email scandal with him. He’s still trying to figure out how to create an account.

Donald Trump's Favorite Bible Verse

“Alright Hotmail, let’s see what all the fuss is about.”

A new study released this week says that workplace stress is as bad for you as second-hand smoke. This makes my boss the step-dad of my adult life.

In sports news this week New York Giants quarterback Eli Manning got an $84 million extension. But I prefer him with shorter hair.

And finally, a girl in Texas this week got stuck in a claw crane machine. Her parents tried to get her out, but after 12 tries they realized those things are rigged.

Donald Trump's Favorite Bible Verse

The story of how she met her new family will make an inspiring Disney movie.